Graduation!

Well, friends, I did it!

I finally managed to graduate with my master's degree! I feel like I've let this blog go to the wayside while I finished up both my second year of teaching and the coursework and paper writing required to finish up. 

My parents flew out for graduation, my husband and I both took a full day off of work, and my brother drove up to see it straight after work. It was truly a wonderful day and a great endpoint to this chapter of my academic career. 

This time graduating was not a big scary cliff I was pushed over, landing squarely and painfully into the real world - I was already entrenched in it and graduation was a refining process. I improved my teaching practice through reflection, writing, and study. I learned how to better communicate and build relationships with people in my academic program. I learned, most of all, how to write the best ever "Can I get coffee with you and pick your brain" email...and I made it a point to use it and seek out wise people who are walking the paths I would like to walk. 

I think age also has a part in that - the difference between 22 and 28, though only six years between, is staggering. I know who I am now, I've had full time jobs in two career trajectories, I've spent time really contemplating what it is I want and who I want to be. My relationship with my husband has evened out through time and refinement and work. I've moved to Colorado and made a life here.   I'm beginning to dig in, do work, and stick around long enough to see the work come to fruition.   

Life settles as you get older, and not in the way that everyone here in Colorado is always railing against, that painful token house in the suburbs, a car payment, and all the accessories. Settling doesn't mean you no longer travel or write off the idea of selling everything and backpacking the world if that's what your heart is set on. It doesn't mean you hang up your guitar or platform wedges or never take your bike out except on the weekends. Settling doesn't mean you accept what you've been given as all there is or stop trying to become a better person, or stop learning. 

It is more about coming to terms with who you are as a person. Maybe self acceptance is a good way to define my version of settling. You make peace with the size of your hips and thighs or nose or the way you look in skinny jeans. You begin to cope with the fact that you always will be or never will be a morning person and your best work is done late at night or first thing and you begin to set aside time during that hours for your passion projects. You begin to toss some of the clothes that were purchased in fits of craziness and create a more cohesive wardrobe that makes putting together work outfits a whole lot easier and a lot less time consuming. You learn to say no when you're overbooked and yes when you're excited about a project. You begin to invest your time in long term ideas and projects, no matter where you are in life. 

And most importantly, you begin to figure out what you want and what you are capable of. And what you are capable of is anything.

Finishing Twenty-Seven

There is a ghost town in the desert. When they put the freeway through it didn't reach to this town so it died when the oil ran out. We take the back roads often through the desert and we know this ghost town well. 

Near this town there is a field of daises. It had taken me by surprise - we were driving along and all of a sudden we were surrounded by a field of white. I had never seen it in bloom like that so I asked JR to pull over and I hopped out into the field of daises. They were tough little buggers, those desert flowers. I had to pinch them hard with my fingernails to pull them up. 

We kept going and found a place to pull over and camp in the BLM land, right against the mesas, in a flat spot against the tumbled rocks. In the morning it was cold and a little overcast, and the wind was incredible. I woke up early before everyone else got up and walked a ways down the road, meditating on the last day of my 27th year.  

Its always hard for me to give up another year for some reason and I get a little melancholy around new years and birthdays. I'm not afraid of aging by any means, but I wonder a lot if I did a good enough job with the year that I'd been given. The desert is a good place to let those thoughts settle.  

Spring Comes Slowly

We're expecting another 6 inches of snow here tonight in Denver. It's like the trees, buds, and blooms get started and another snow kills them off. Then, they try again.

I admire their persistance. 

And their patience. 

***

Shirt: Gap (Similar here)

Pants: j. crew

Belt: Land's End

Shoes: Thrifted

Adventure Time: A One Day Colorado Itinerary.

We went adventuring yesterday, JR and I. We got in our tiny car, packed with a little bit of cash and my knitting project, and headed out south and west to see what we could find.

(I needed a day off from reality - reality has been so difficult lately!)

As we were driving through the backroad of Colorado we stumbled upon vineyards. In a bit of glory, these vineyards were attached to Mount Holy Cross Abbey, a former boy's catholic school and monastery. The grapes are partially grown on the grounds and other people in the community (including the inmates at a nearby prison and people who live around the Abbey) contribute the rest.

 

Even in the middle of a desolate spring the vineyards are beautiful, and the Abbey itself was gorgeous having been built in a style of architecture that is not commonly seen in the West, especially a rural area.

 

After wandering around the grounds for awhile we continued up into the mountains, stopping at The Royal Gorge Bridge park. This was a pretty huge tourist attraction and I imagine it gets a lot of visitors in the summer but since it's not quite tourist season yet we got to wander around a nearly empty park. I'm not a huge fan of heights but I enjoyed myself regardless, sweating it out as I crossed the gorge in their cable car and the bridge. We also took the incline railway down to the bottom, and then back up.

Finally, we had a very late lunch and went hiking at Hellen Hunt Falls on our way back. I love Hellen Hunt Falls area because it's one of the lushest places along the front range. Colorado is incredibly dry and I struggle with how brown it looks most of the time. I miss the humidity and the water and the moss and the way a damp forest smells so I head to Hellen Hunt for a bit of that every so often. It's an old park area that used to be the grounds of a hotel and so there is a little bit of infrastructure in the park - old bridges and buildings and crumbling water supply systems - that you can stumble upon as you hike around. At the top there's a beautiful waterfall and at the bottom there's a great visitor center with the history of the park as well.

(The only picture of me on the Royal Gorge Bridge. If you want to see pictures in and around Hellen Hunt Falls you can check out my instagram here.)

***

Scarf: Unknown (similar here)

Earrings: Unknown (similar here)

Jacket: Barbour

Shirt: Lands End 

Sweater: Unknown

Jeans: j. crew

Shoes: Sperry Topsiders

Handbag:  Longchamp Le Pliage

Of Rights and Responsibilities

I've been thinking a lot, particularly as I drive, about the etymology of the word stewardship. I have been mulling over the history of the word as well as what it means to be a steward in this day and age.

My older etiquette books (cira 1840's) refer to a steward as the head caretaker of an estate. They had the right and responsibility to manage it, and do it well. A steward was involved in all matters of the estate, from accounting for possessions to making sure the land was managed well and was productive. A steward was one of the most important hires a family could make, and to have a good steward was to have a successfully run estate. 

As time moved forward to train, then ship, then air travel the word steward began to refer to someone who was responsible for you, the traveler. They would take care of your baggage, your cabin, and attend to your needs. 

Today we no longer have stewards and stewardesses out and about. We refer to the helpful (and sometimes cranky...but mostly helpful!) people on airplanes as flight attendants. I haven't traveled long distances by large boat, though, and there may be a person aboard who is a steward. 

Bearing that in mind - I am my own steward. I hold stewardship over all of the the experiences, things, and people I have the fortune or misfortune to come to know. I hold the responsibility for how well my limited estate runs. 

I don't believe that you ever truly own anything. Everything is simply on loan to you - it has been given with the intent that you may use it to serve your purpose but you must take care of it, demonstrate your stewardship of what you have. I feel as if I can take care of what I'm given now - from my career to my relationships to the objects in my house - I will be better prepared to handle the large things later. 

Here are some small ways I show stewardship:

- I buy the best quality I can afford and maintain it -  I save to buy one pair of leather boots I can wear for years instead of four pairs of plastic ones I can wear for three months, I  mend any repairs needed in clothing once every few weeks, wash it carefully and properly, quickly wipe down appliances when I'm done using them, rinse out my makeup brushes once a week, keep the inside and outside of my car clean.

- I keep in touch with the people who I value, regardless of what gain they bring to my life - I write letters, call, text, send out a semi-monthly family newsletter, meet for coffee

- I stay on top of my finances - My income is limited as a teacher but I know how to shuffle the money I do make into the places that count - Savings (both long term and for things I want in the near future) first, paying down student loans second, bills third, and everything else last. 

- I focus on the long term - This is a tough one. I, like anyone else, enjoy a bit of instant gratification. If I see it, I want to buy it right away. I want things now - a better paying job, a sailboat, a nicer car, travel, moving abroad. I know, however, that life doesn't work that way for most people. You have to build your life, build your estate, manage it well, work hard at it, and things will happen. A few people get lucky and things just happen - the rest of us, though? We have to build it ourselves. It's not a bad thing, though. It teaches perseverance. 

How do you show stewardship in your life?

***

Scarf: Unknown (similar here)

Earrings: Unknown (similar here)

Jacket: Barbour

Shirt: Urban Outfitters (can't find a comparable shirt, sorry!)

Skirt: Self Made

Boots: Frye 

Hello, Beautiful!

Kate Spade opened a new store here in Denver. 

They invited me to take a look around and even though I was in the middle of epic paper writing I decided to go and take a peek.

I could wax poetic about Kate Spade purchases in bygone days, about how I spent my first paycheck from my first job in college on a handbag I still have, about driving down to Chicago in high school and peeking at her store on the Miracle Mile, but I'm not.

I'm just going to appreciate the clean lines, bursts of color, and great clothes of the women who came to the Kate Spade event here. 

Where am I?

Q: Where have I been? 

A: Typing away. 

It's my last semester of graduate school and Everything Big (yes, it is a proper noun in my brain!) is due March 27th. Expect radio silence until then! I don't know what I was thinking trying do do a 50 hr a week job (teaching!) and six graduate credits and the final paper all at once, along with a healthy dose of spring base miles.

 I graduate, officially, May 10th. Not only will I post pictures of me in my fantastic cap and gown (and masters hood!) holding a diploma cover with no diploma... I will start updating regularly!

(When I go for my doctorate I'm going to be a full time student! None of this working/school nonsense!) 

In That Dream Moving Slow Through the Morning Light...

Winter's here. It's been very cold this past week. Well, except for today, where it was in the 50's! But it's still cold in the mornings. I drink cups and cups of tea in my classroom in an effort to stay warm before school starts and the heat kicks on. 

Lucky for me I have a brand new coat to keep me warm. Down, on sale, from Land's End. Warmer than any of my husband's coats so finally I'm the one turning the heat down in the car when we are on our way to places!

Coat: Land's End Cire Down Parka

Jeans: j. crew Matchstick Jeans

(Yes, it is true. These are the only jeans I own. I own four pairs of them.)

Shoes: Anthro

Purse: Longchamp Le Pliage

Listening:

Ten things for 2013

Here are ten things that are making my life lovelier this year. They are small things, nothing fancy, just little things I've loved having around in my life this January. 

1. Workbasket

Inspired by the idea of 18th and 19th century women's workbaskets I decided to corral many of my personal projects and things to do into a basket to be taken out in the evenings and worked on a little at a time. 

2. 2013 memory jar

I found this clever idea on Pinterest. I'm looking forward to opening it up on January first of next year and looking over all the wonderful things we did in 2013.

3. A stack of new and old favorites to read

I received a lot of books over the holidays and I've been utilizing paperback swap - there are lots of books to read around here and I've been curling up with them in the evenings. 

4. My planner

I purchased this last summer but it's still going strong, looks beautiful, and keeps me organized. I know exactly when everything is happening, I can jot down ideas in the blank pages and the book club book of the month on the top of each monthly calendar. There's even a spot for two lines of daily gratitude. I like to use Washi tape to block out larger projects, workflow, or time off. 

5. Our new couch

Finally, the wait is over. We have somewhere to sit!

6. Grey suede booties

I bought these in November in anticipation of holiday parties but they have turned out to be incredibly comfortable so I've been wearing them to work a lot. It's hard to find shoes that match my school's incredibly strict dress code, look nice, and don't make you want to soak your feet in a tub of ice after chasing twenty-six 8 year olds!

7. Letters to and from

I'm a dedicated letter writer and I look forward sending and receiving more of these dear missives from dear friends. 

8. French press

We've been long contemplating switching from our regular drip coffee maker to a French press coffee maker. We've been holding back because said drip coffee maker works perfectly fine. We received this French press coffee maker as a gift so there's no reason not to switch now!

9. Reorganized desk/workspace

The couch prompted a reorganization of our living space. I decided to move the desk behind the couch so I could look out the window as I worked, I cleared off a lot of random things that we really were not using, and I found some pretty things to hold supplies, pens, and stationary. We used the couch to split our living room into two distinct spaces: one for working and one for relaxing. It's been really great to have a better flow in our main living space. 

10. New Workout Clothes

January has been a bit of a wash for working out. I had a week in between bronchitis and an injury that's waylaid me to get my workout on but I know as soon as I'm cleared to head back to the gym I have some super cute clothes to wear while doing it!